Tommy Cash – “The American Way Of Life” LP (1971)
Would you believe I finally found a job? After lazing around on Uncle Sam’s dime for a year and a half, I found myself on my very last day of unemployment benefits with no hope in sight, when I got a call from a recruiter I hadn’t talked to in months and had written off as a lost cause. Turns out this company needed a guy with my skills immediately, so I went home, shaved, put on the ole “interview suit”, drove out to the place and, after about two hours of negotiations, walked out with a job and started the next day. So why am I bringing this up? Well, a lot of people are out of work right now, can’t get a job, can’t feed their kids, are losing their homes, etc., and I just want to make sure that people remember that there are powerful, unseen forces working in the world that regulate our existence AND THEY FAVOR ME AND HATE YOU!!! HA!! Naw, I’m just kidding, folks. Mr. Poopy is the friend of all working people—just like Tommy Cash.
This is another concept LP and, while it isn’t nearly as stellar as “The Man Behind The Badge”, it is an entertaining listen. Generally, I’m a sucker for concept LPs—especially when the guy gives a little speech or intro before each song and even more so when he just kind of mumbles it like Tommy does. And, yes, Tommy is Johnny’s brother. Basically, the record attempts to pay tribute to the working people that make America great, although his America appears to leave out doctors, cops, migrant workers, and politicians, among many others. The importance of women in the workforce isn’t lost on him, however, as he has two songs dedicated to working chicks: “The Housewife” and “The Waitress”. Actually, the tale of old Nellie, the waitress, is probably my favorite track. I mean, sure, her grammar sucks and she’s inefficient and screws up the orders, but she’s a good ole gal with a sweet smile and good manners who’ll take a dime for a tip.
Workin' Men
SAMPLE TRACKS:
Download (Rapidshare) HERE
Download (Megaupload) HERE
C Company – “Battle Hymn Of LT. Calley / Routine Patrol” 7″ (1971)
I’ve found several copies of this record over the years and it isn’t particularly rare, as it shared a label with the much better known and fairly popular Jeanie C. Riley and was also released on LP. Both sides of this 7” are great slabs of Right Wing Americana, done in the talky-sing-y style of Johnny Sea, Red Sovine, and a slew of other Country Western artists of the Fifties and Sixties. So you say you’ve never heard of LT. Calley? Yes, you have. In fact, photos of the My Lai Massacre have graced the covers of hundreds of Lefty Punk and Hardcore records! Of course, the big difference is that C Company (short for Charlie Company) is defending him, while most of those Lefty bands (who probably don’t even know where the pictures came from) would probably crucify the guy! Personally, the whole issue is a little before my time, but my experience is that the government doesn’t let stuff like the My Lai incident leak out to the public unless they want it to. Otherwise, they probably use the pictures for Christmas cards and send them to each other!
THE TRACKS:
Download (Rapidshare) HERE
Download (Megaupload) HERE
Kryon – “Seven Responsibilities Of The New Age” Tape (199?)
I’m pleased to say I can’t claim an intimate familiarity with drugs like coke, crack, meth, smack, etc., but there’s this stuff that would leave the user wandering around town, mumbling to themselves, only vaguely aware of their surroundings, only to eventually collapse in a heap due to exhaustion, often pissing and shitting themselves in the process. I always assumed it was rock, but my guess is the eventual collapse was the result of sleep deprivation from days of non-stop use, rather than the drug itself. So I’m doing my usual digging in a thrift shop in a crummy part of town and one of those zombies walks in, mumbling and acting sketchy, but I’m the only one who seems to notice the guy, as most of the other customers and employees are almost as brain-dead as he is. He disappears from sight for a couple minutes, only to reappear with a pair of like-new brown leather cowboy boots on his feet, with the tags still on them and his pants tucked in. He starts walking down the aisle towards me but it was at this point that his legs gave out from under him and he falls to the ground, bashing his head on the steel clothes rack with blood gushing out of his head all over the floor.
Now, mind you, I’ve seen a lot of people lose their shit, so, in a rare presence of mind, I began watching the clock at the other end of the store and watched as some of the other zombies stepped over his bleeding body like he wasn’t even there for about five minutes, before somebody did something about it. And why didn’t the only white dude for miles, who happened to see the whole thing, run over and attend to his, very likely, HIV-infected ass, you might ask? Geeze, I don’t know, but they don’t call me Mr. Poopy for nothing. At any rate, as the walking dead man finally got to his feet, he grabbed a straw cowboy hat, that just happened to be laying near by, smearing blood all over it with his bloody hands, and jammed it crookedly on top of his bleeding head as he ran out the door with the stolen cowboy boots. And the point of this story is what? Nothing! Except that I went back to my digging and I found this Kryon tape that I am offering in this post and, every time I look at it, I think of that freak in the thrift store.
So what do the folks at Kryon believe? Well, basically, that we are all space aliens, sent here to Earth to inhabit human bodies and increase the Earth’s cosmic vibrations until we get to shed our Earth bodies and travel back to the Mother Planet and live in bliss for all eternity. Makes sense to me.
SAMPLE:
You Are The Light Of The World
Download HERE
Rudy Ray Moore – “The Sensuous Black Man” LP (197?)
I can’t help but notice you people keep downloading that Richard and Willie LP. You are all clearly swine, but I’m not complaining. At any rate, if you liked that record, then this one should float your boat, as well. Personally, I think this record is much better. Everyone should be familiar with the works of Rudy Ray Moore, so I won’t even bother with an introduction, but this is one LP I’d be willing to bet will never see the light of day again, and it’s a real shame because it’s the best thing he ever did. A message of Hope, Change, and overall uplifting of our culture that will sound throughout the ages. Play loud!!
SAMPLE:
Download HERE
Kali Bahlu – “Cosmic Remembrance” LP (1967)
I hadn’t listened to this record in years, prior to doing this blog and I had truly forgotten how nuts this LP is. It really doesn’t get much weirder than this one and to say they don’t make ‘em quite like Kali Bahlu anymore would be putting it mildly. I simply can’t imagine who would have bought this thing back in 1967–even your typical, stupid Hippie would have had little use for this kind of insanity. What we have here are four cosmic “fairy tales”, narrated by the piercing voice of an LSD-inebriated Kali Bahlu. Anyone ever watch those old Dragnet episodes with Hippies in them? Well, Kali could have easily fit in with that crowd, as this record almost comes off as a cartoon of someone completely out of their mind on drugs. But this is no cartoon—the lady is serious. My favorite track on this is “A Cosmic Telephone Call From The Angel Liesle And The Buddha”, but WordPress isn’t cooperating with me, so you’ll have to download to hear it. Trust me, it doesn’t get any more “outer-limits” than this shit!
SAMPLE TRACK:
Download HERE
Dr. Warren H. Carroll – “America: The Last Crossroads” LP (196?)
This is one of my favorites of this kind of spoken-word LP. If you can’t hear some eerie prophecy on this one, then you simply aren’t paying attention. I guess you could argue that, even if things were a hundred times better than they are now, their would be “X” amount of people concocting theories like this but, all the same, does anyone care to argue that the standard of living has improved over the last forty years?
Rear Cover
Download HERE
Richard & Willie – “Funky Honkey, Nasty Nigger” LP (1975)
The cover of this LP has shown up on a few sites that like to show off bad record covers and, yet, none of those sites were considerate enough to offer the contents of the record. What a tease! Well, I will now rectify that and, honestly, I don’t see what all the fuss is about—the cover looks fine to me! For some reason humor tends not to stand the test of time. What was hilarious twenty years ago may not be considered nearly as funny today. Regardless, this thing seems to hold up a little better than many, although it is mostly potty-mouth and sex joke stuff.
Download HERE
Dan Smoot – “Our Nation’s Pact With The Devil” LP (1965)
Another Dan Smoot LP and more of the same prophetic anti-Commie dialogue. I wonder what this guy would be saying if he could look at forty years of steady decline like people could now.
Download HERE
Dr. Hilly James Hargis – “The United Nations Hoax” LP (196?)
Yeah, I could listen to this shit all fuckin’ day. I never tire of it. And, as I sit in my bunker, twenty feet below the ground, with my skin turning blue from ingesting colloidal silver, you can bet your ass I’m glad I took this stuff seriously! You people need to realize that the UN deal works both ways—those second and third world countries that are also UN members get to “police” us, too, if need be. And don’t you forget it!
Rear Cover
Download LP HERE
Dr. Jack Van Impe – “The Coming War With Russia” LP (1973)
Should anyone be in need of an example of what a complete, gibbering lunatic sounds like, this LP should suffice. Honestly, I’ve listened to this LP about a half dozen times now and I still can’t give a detailed outline of what transpires on this thing. Mr. Van Impe is one of those religious fruitcakes that steals passages from the “Big Book Of Jewish Fairy Tales” and molds them to fit his “prophecies”—and manages to make a decent living at it, to boot! Sure, it sounds like I’m “hating” on the guy here, but I’m actually jealous. If someone gave me the chance to “interpret” the ambiguous crap in that book to earn my bread and butter, I could do it all fucking day—and probably better! I think I might have missed my calling—but it’s never too late! The thing is, I suspect you have to either be a complete lunatic or raving sociopath to feed people that sort of bullshit with a straight face, so maybe it’s not for me after all.
I saw an ad for this guy on TV a couple weeks ago, so apparently Jack Van Impe is still going strong. I figure there have to be at least several million idiots out there who buy into this sort of shit–and each of them should have to pay me a dollar. That should balance out the universe.
SAMPLE TRACK:
Download HERE
Hal Lindsey – “The 1980′s: Countdown To Armageddon” LP (1980)
Well, I hope no one has been holding their breath since this one came out. Looks like we’re still here almost thirty years later, so what do you have to say about that, Hal? Seems like there is always some jerk trying to tells us it’s the end of the world and right now they’re going hog wild with it. It’s gonna happen in 2012—look out!! My fuckin’ ass!! Don’t even get my hopes up!! Hal Lindsey, as some of you may or may not know, wrote a book and later a movie called “ The Late, Great Planet Earth” that had a lot of people’s panties in a bundle back in the day. I think he had a TV show, as well, but I’m fishing the old memory banks on that one. A quick search reveals that this guy is still alive, but I haven’t heard a thing about him in years.
What we have here is your typical Christian nuttiness and Prophecy based on the “Big Book Of Jewish Fairy Tales”. Lunatics like this have been providing folks like me with something to laugh at for years and years. And it will never end. These people are never going to shut up until they get the Armageddon they’ve been praying for.
Download HERE
Dan Smoot – “The Fearless American” LP (1964?)
Another John Birch LP from back in their heyday in the early to mid-sixties. Actually, I don’t believe Dan Smoot was totally on board with those guys, but his ideology was pretty much the same. Supposedly, he even had a beef with George Bush the Elder back in the day, accusing him of not being conservative enough! He was also a former FBI agent and published a publication called the Dan Smoot Report for a number of years and wrote a couple books that rest in the Mr. Poopy archives. It should be a cause for concern that people were talking like this back in those days—things weren’t nearly as bad back then as they are now.
Download LP HERE
Tom Anderson – “Here We Go Again” LP (1964?)
This LP was put out on KEY Records, the label run by the John Birch Society. I own several records on this label. This right wing organization had a large following back in the 60’s, consisting mostly of independent businessmen and other “upright” citizens. Their failing appeared to be a lack of willingness to take radical action to support their beliefs, leading to a drop in membership. They still have chapters all over the US, but they are a shell of what they used to be.
Yes, there is no music here—you have to be able to pay attention and focus on what people are saying. It’s pretty “tough” stuff and probably beyond the mental capacity of most of you shmoes. I feel it is important to bring these old records back to light, as what is being spoken of on this LP reflects very much the type of talk I hear floating around today in various circles and a lot of what is said on these records actually came true later on. This LP was recorded at the height of the John Birch Society’s power, during the midst of the Johnson administration. Many people blame some of the policies set into motion during this presidency as being responsible for a lot of the destructive policies the US now suffers from—especially immigration. Of course, I wasn’t there, but I tend to pay attention to what was going on around this time, as it appears that this was when things really began falling apart for us. Plenty more vintage anti-Commie stuff where this came from.
Download LP HERE
Joe Aufricht – “Mockery & Perversion” Cassette (1995)
If this Blog accomplishes nothing else, it will be that the world will finally get to hear all the Joe Aufricht tapes. Not that the world is dying to hear it mind you, and you may wish you were dead after about ten minutes of this shit! Parts of the “Perversion” side of this tape have been kicking around the web for a while, but now you clowns get to hear the whole thing. Honestly, I couldn’t guess at the number of times I’ve listened to Side One of this tape—I’d definitely say a lot—possibly nearing the triple digits. I kid you not. But I’m not alone in my love of this tape and Mr. Aufricht should take a bow for amusing us far more than we deserve.
I’ll confess I’m a little clumsy at explaining this thing, but what Joe says in the first couple sentences of Side One pretty much sums it up, whether you realize it or not. The uninitiated may listen to this and think they are listening to some guy trying to be weird / offensive / sophomoric and while, indeed, it does sound like that, I can assure you that you are dead wrong to think so. Understand that and clear your mind of all illusions to the contrary. Joe is not joking around on this thing—he is totally serious. Once you have fully grasped that fact, it starts to take on entirely new dimensions and the real fun begins. This thing really smacks you in the back brain and, if it doesn’t, then you are not being honest with yourself or, perhaps, you’re a woman. Realize that this only makes sense to Joe and that it is only meaningful to Joe and that he could care less if it means anything to anybody else but him. If you can’t get through this tape, the other ones below will be even tougher.
Joe also plays guitar in a Black Metal band called Satanicon, despite the fact that he has to be almost fifty years old by now and, no doubt, the mentally fit, rational members of that community are doing wonders for the guy! Hail Satanic Youthfulness!
Inside Cover
Download HERE
Joe Aufricht – “Youthful Satanic Ecstacy” Cassette (1993)
Here is another of the four Joe Aufricht tapes I own. I believe this was his first one–not like it matters. Did you ever play with a tape recorder when you were a kid, making your own little radio shows, perhaps? Well, I did. It was tons of fun, too. Apparently, Mr. Aufricht enjoyed it, as well. In fact, he like it so much, he figured he’d keep right on doing it up into his early 30’s. In this thing, he is traveling back in time and recreating a period in his life when he was 13-years-old and fell in love with a 9-year-old girl a couple of grades below him. Was there a “target audience” for this stuff, Joe?
Inside Cover
Download HERE
Joe Aufricht – “Evil Phone Prankster” Cassette (1994)
In this one, Joe is back to the year of 1994 and is no longer 13-years-old. However, he still hasn’t gotten over the 9-year-old he had the hots for, although I gather this story takes place when they are a little older. This is as close as he gets to a straightforward narrative, but it still isn’t easy to get through from start to finish. If one thing stands out immediately, it’s that Joe just doesn’t know when to quit. Seriously. And how does he remember all this shit in such vivid detail? The guy is recalling events that happened 20 years ago, as a child, no less, like it was a couple of days ago, complete with dialogue! I think most people are pretty happy to forget those awkward early teen years, but Joe is completely hung up on them and is determined to re-live them, only getting it right the second time around! This is a tale of insanity and desperate young love, told through the lips of a maniac.
Inside Cover
Download HERE
Joe Aufricht – “Propaganda Interview” Cassette (1995)
If you managed to get this far, this interview will serve to explain a bit of it at least. Recorded live on WCSB in Cleveland, Joe discusses his church, Satanism, and answers questions from callers.
Download HERE
Lavon Lambeth – “Man And His Awareness” LP (1975)
This guy comes of as such a douchebag on this thing, it’s mind numbing. In fact, he is so annoying it’s almost not funny—but it is, mostly because the man appears to be completely serious!
On the first side of the LP, Lavon builds himself up to be quite the playa, with lots of money, nice clothes, a stylin’ do, and hot chicks—but he still ain’t satisfied! Something’s missing! Oh, no! There must be a woman out there good enough for Lavon and, miraculously, there is! In fact, this chick be all-that-and-a-bag-of-chips so much, that he spends the better part of side two professing his passionate love for her—and he’s pretty darn serious about it, too!
This record came out thirty-four years ago and I still want to reach through the speakers and smack the guy when I play it.
Download LP HERE
LSD – “A Documentary Report” (1966)
Who the hell bought this record when it came out? Seeing as it is a major label release, I would assume it was squares across America, trying to understand all those worthless Hippies and keep their kids from “turning on”. All in all, this LP is a pretty interesting listen and certainly has its moments here and there. And what’s up with Timothy Leary? He sounds like “Stevie” from Malcolm In The Middle.
SAMPLE TRACK:
Download entire LP HERE
Isaac Air Freight – “KUSS” (1980)
It takes a keen eye and a sharp wit to mine the gold from the piles of lame Christian records that fill the record bins of thrift stores across America. Suffice it to say, Mr. Poopy possesses such an eye and wit and, thus, I present you with these ridiculous recordings. Isaac Air Freight was a Christian comedy group who took a hard-line, fundamentalist approach for the most part, and cranked out a few albums in the 1970’s and 1980’s. These guys were by no means idiots and, unlike other contemporaries, actually possessed a fair degree of wit but, as one can only imagine, anything based on their kind of death-cult philosophy can do little but suck the fun out of just about anything!
What we have here is a skit on the evils of Punk Rock, featuring a fake band called “Kuss”. Actually, I think the band sounds pretty good—that “I’m Bored / You’re Bored” song really speaks to me! Classic stuff that I bet 99.9% of the punkers on the planet never had a chance to hear. I also offer up “Cult”, which I feel requires little explanation.
Take a closer look at the cover art below. On the front you have the guys preaching to a couple of scientist / mathematician types and a scholar, while on the back you see the scientists marginalized, wearing dunce caps, and the scholarly chap with his hat removed joining the gang in prayer—thus, the “fools are confounding the wise”! Get it? And the hilarity just goes on and on, so much so that I even uploaded the entire LP for you other nuts who get a kick out of getting into these people’s heads!
Listen to tracks below:
Download LP HERE
Sonny ‘n Sis / Mary Loves Lori (196? or 197?)
In an age of moral decline, it is hard to find a study of brotherly love and women’s studies portrayed as effectively as it is on this record. The internet was created for sharing files like this and, hopefully, this will expand your consciousness as much as it has mine. I have been looking for other records from this series for years but to no avail. Anyone out there know anything about this label? Or, better yet, if you have another record from this series, would you be so kind as to share? I can’t imagine anything being as good as this, though.
Download it HERE.